What is HOT? What is NOT?

I wonder if anyone has ever considered that weight may not just be about calories in and calories burned.  Seriously what if weight is not that at all.

Here is this thing that has bothered me for a really long time when it comes to weight.  Why do men have higher weight standards than women?  They say that it is because men have more muscle.  But I know a lot of women who work harder than men and I know a lot of men who are serious couch potatoes.  So why do we still have this standard that it is okay for men to weigh more than a woman who is the same height?

What is hot?

Why do we not think that women who can bear a child in a few short hours of easy labor (big hips) and breast feed a baby with milk to spare (naturally large but soft breasts and some body fat) are not the epitome of female beauty?  Why do men think a female body that is barely out of adolescence and therefore lacking this child bearing body as being more attractive than a woman whose body is geared towards child rearing?

Why do men find unintelligent women with “slamming bodies” attractive?  Is the physical appearance truly better than the ability to out think others?

Why do elephants have so much body fat, if it is all about calories in and energy used shouldn’t elephants be as thin as a cheetah?  What about walrus?  Surely they use alot of energy why do their bodies look so fat?  Shouldn’t they be thinner?

Does anyone realize that many naturally thin women exist on diet coke and yogurt?  Really.  When I weighed 110 pounds and was “hot” I drank two pots of coffee a day, smoked 12 cigarettes a day and ate one meal a day.  I could walk 18 miles uphill and barely break a sweat.  I know a lot of women like this.  One day I asked a woman what her diet was to stay so thin, and what her exercise was.  She informed me that she had an eating disorder so not to use her as a model of thin.  She also was hospitalized for said eating disorder a year later.

What of naturally thin vegetarian woman who died a few years ago at a gym.  She was a young 40ish and dropped dead of  a heart attack while running her mandatory miles on the treadmill at the gym.

Once I did Weight Watchers for a year.  I lost 20 pounds immediately, and as carefully as I followed the diet I could not lose another pound.  It was brutal.  It is not, for my body, about calories in and energy used.

I once did the South Beach Diet and lost an additional 10 pounds immediately.  Exercise was not physically possible but I was now 30 pounds lighter than when I started.  One day I was at the gym and I ate my cheese stick and pistachios and broccoli omelet for breakfast but nearly passed out from the drop in my blood sugar.  I realized at that moment that carbs really do play a role in overall health.

I am in good shape. Have a normal heart rate, normal blood pressure, can walk for miles at a brisk pace, yes even uphill.  Enjoy physical activity, eat right, and am very flexible.  And yet – and yet I am over that scale for a woman in the doctors office.  A little high on that scale for men and yes I do have a lot of fat on my upper thighs and my belly.  But I am not sloppy or fat by any means.  Also I wear a size 9 ring on my finger and bangles will not slip over my wrists and did not do so even when I was thin.  I truly have big bones.  It is not just a silly thing that people say on Saturday Night Live.  Even when I weighed 110 pounds I had to wear a larger size pant because my hip bones stuck out beyond my body fat.  And my skirt size was literally 4 sizes smaller than my pant size.  I could fit the skirt over my hips and fasten it at my waist and it would fit fine.

I know I live in a state of denial.  But the truth is I have my doubts about the weight loss industry.  It is too big to battle.  And we all know that no one wants to battle the food industry, because you can loose weight on a twinkie diet and be thin, but who wants to really?

In the end I think we will discover that weight has more to do with genetics and hormones than it does to do with calories in and energy used.  In the meantime.  In the mean time.  Can we call men on their attitudes when they choose a hot woman over a smart one?  A skinny woman over a strong one?  An altered woman over a natural one?  It is time to shift our culture.  Don’t let them get away with it anymore.  It’s time our boys started acting like men.

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9 comments on “What is HOT? What is NOT?

  1. Good post, Meg. Good issues about the entire “hot” body image issue. I’ve been giving it more thought than usual since your “chubby” observation about the naked truth of 1870. I wonder if the skinny skinny ideal is the result of some sort of dysfunctional fixation that entered our culture via some one else’s distrubed notions. Then there’s the element of our hollow value system in general and disconnection from our natural biological character that everyone wants to control–sweat, smell, ovulation, hair growth etc. No wonder our “boys” seldom mature into real men. Hmm. Well, that’s my 1 cent for the moment.

  2. Thanks, I have had this on my mind so much. I cannot figure out if this is truly an issue of our culture or not. Your post about Diane Sawyer along with so many comments by boys on many different sites about HOT women. I find it so irritating.

    I also know that there was a time when chubbiness was a sign of health whereas the emaciated look that is so popular in the media was considered a sign of poor health. I also saw a story one time about this guy who ran like 10 miles a day was 50 pounds overweight but his blood pressure was like 90/65 and his resting heart rate was an astounding 60 beats a minute.

    I see so much in our media as biased and I cannot help but wonder who is funding the think yourself thin, or if you would just exercise, or the if you would just not eat as much, I don’t think it is truly that simple. Okay. More to think about. Thanks for inspiring my many year thoughts for this week.

    • I agree that none of it is ‘simple’. Our bodies are what they’re ‘genetically engineered’ to be.
      I do hope you caught the sarcasm of my “hot” anchors point. I discovered that while just looking for a photo of Swayer–whom I couldn’t care less about. I don’t watch news on the idiot box very often but I was curious about what they were covering regading recent events. I couldnot beleive what was NOT there after my daily dose of Democracy Now and other programs on the radio–and online. AND then there was the obvious ‘pretty package’ factor all across the screen–and that just seemed totally insulting.
      Oops–this is starting to sound like venting–so–I do hope you didn’t think I was supporting this “hot” notion–quite the opposite.
      Hope you get to enjoy your snowshoes!

  3. Hi Meg,
    This post caught my eye. I battled the weight thing for a long time when younger. I lost the weight. I am here to tell you I do not think I was any “hotter” thin than a little overweight. I would find it awfully boring to companion with someone who based that companionship on my appearance and it certainly would not last very long, this “thin” relationship. Better that I stay on the lookout for that special someone.

  4. Did either of you see the NY Times review of the Nutcracker in which the reviewer said one of the ballerinas- Jenifer Ringer (The sugar plum fairy) had eaten one sugar plum too many? When I see this it makes me think even more so that our culture is skewed on this issue.

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